In constant flux, just when I feel connected, it’s time to let go. I’m talking about people, groups, whatever. I have 2 constants, my relationship with God and my family. Everything else seems subject to change. I’m just mourning the loss of friends and teachers, wondering what will come next. Detach.
I get excited about things, relationships, people, especially when I feel I have made a new friend. But the hurt of loss makes me fearful at times of ever trying again, of taking steps toward a new friendship, of reaching out. I so easily feel rejected, but I hunger for more than the superficial. I have that tender pain in my chest. Detach.
When I serve others, like at VERONICA’s Voice, it is different. I am just there to completely give of myself with no expectations.
It’s different with relationships. I expect communication and effort from both sides. When it seems this is happening, I think FINALLY. Attach.
But perhaps sometimes I am hasty or hopeful or delusional. Detach.
And sometimes I’m the one who really needs to move on. Detach.